Dear Tube Socks

Dear Tube Socks,

It’s me again. I hope you had a good year. Free of athletes’ feet and toe jams. Lemme cut to the chase. On Decemberween morning, when I open you guys up, you’re going to hear…things. Hurtful things. Unforgivable things. Things like, Uhhh… and Oh, man! and This present of tube socks totally sucks and I hate it! Don’t you believe a word of it, Tube Socks.

I love you guys. I don’t know what I’d do without my yearly pair. But a guy’s gotta keep up appearances, right? If peoples found out I have a soft spot for tube socks, it’d be all over. It took me years to live down that Martina Navratilova poster…and I will not go down that road again.

We can be secret friends. Like that hunchback kid at school. In closing, please disregard any and all negative comments or negative burning you may hear or experience on Decemberween.

Stealthily Yours,

Strong Bad